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  “Candles in the wind” by Sujen   (for the email address see the author's page)
Disclaimer:  All persons mentioned in this story are property of their respective owners. Earth: Final Conflict belongs to Tribune Entertainment Co., Lost Script Prod. Inc., Atlantis Films and VOX. Please don't publish this story without permission of the author.
 
Subject:  A story about Beckett's death and the thoughts and feelings it evokes in herself, Sandoval and Liam
Setting:  This story takes place in the second season, parallel to the events of the episode “Redemption”
Cast:  Siobhan Beckett, Sandoval, Liam
 
Author's comments:  dedicated to a love that touched my heart
                                      with a great thank you to my friend Ellen Birkhahn for translating
 

 

CANDLES IN THE WIND

 

“It's our fate to get together,
no matter how much you fight it.”

(Beckett to Sandoval in “The joining”)

 

Prologue
 

The rune of destiny ...
How cool and smooth it felt, yet it seemed to be burning in her hand, set on fire by the look in his eyes, the look that spoke different words than his mouth did.
Beckett searched for Sandoval's gaze and held it.
She smiled while the flickering light of the candles cast shadows on the wall and his face, where she found the confirmation of what she had known all along.
He couldn't fool her any more than he could fool himself.
Fate had brought them together.
When he said goodbye and left, she knew that it was an escape.
She gazed at the rune in the palm of her hand.
The two candles on her bed flickered slightly in the warm evening breeze that had found its way through the open window of the hotel room.
Two candles ...
Symbols of two lives joined together inseparably forever.
Sandoval wouldn't be able to withstand fate.
Not by a long shot no matter how hard he tried.
She could wait.
No matter how long it would take.
In the end she would succeed.
Beckett inched forward and placed the rune on the sheet, between the flickering candles.

 

Act # 1
 

Lieutenant Siobhan Beckett had always been proud of her stamina. She couldn't remember ever being sick. The implantation had even made her condition better. In the three years that she'd served the Taelons by now, she had always felt healthy and in good shape. That was why the pounding headache that had tortured her for days now worried her even more. If it wasn't going to pass anytime soon she would have to see a doctor. She didn't like doctors but the pain spoiled her concentration and therefore her effectivity for La'el. Like all Taelons the British Companion expected a full commitment from the humans that served him and from his Im-plantee Beckett he expected a commitment that exceeded that of the volunteers many times over.
Beckett concentrated on synchronising her movements with the melody, on becoming one with the music that came from invisible speakers.
The clear, bright voice of the singer moved over Beckett's skin like a caress. The lyrics of the old Celtic ballad revolved around the passionate love of a proud warrior towards the high priestess of the goddess of the earth, who would rather die than betray the goddess in his arms.
Nearly all Celtic fairy tales had a sad ending.
Hot pain flashed through Beckett's temples. Without a warning the walls of the room started to spin.
“You have changed, Siobhan, I barely recognise you. What happened to your dreams?”
“I have gained so much more than I ever dreamed of, mother.”
Desperately Beckett concentrated on a steady point while many voices whispered at her.
“Commander Boone should be to your liking.”
“You have changed, Siobhan.”
“Lieutenant Beckett will help you search for the Atavus.”
“I barely recognise you.”
“There is no room for feelings in my life.”
“What happened to your dreams?”
So many voices, whispering behind her forehead. Beckett crumpled to the floor.
“Why do you refuse to become a Companion-protector, Captain Marquette?”
“Maybe for the same reason my independence obviously threatens you so much.”
Black mists began to surround Beckett.
“Do we know each other, Major Kincaid?”
“Not from this life.”
Beckett's consciousness drowned in a whirl of pain, voices and wafts of mists.

 

Act # 2
 

Sandoval's glance followed Zo'or. The Taelon's openly displayed worry surprised him, but he didn't let it show.
“What if Lieutenant Beckett's implant fails?”
Sandoval had known that question would come. He knew what kind of an answer Zo'or expected him to give.
There was only one answer to that question.
But there had been Beckett's face, her gaze that seemed to reach to the deepest part of his soul, her smile that had accompanied her words.
“Sometimes you have to jump into the abyss without a safety net.”
Why was he thinking about that just now?
About the feelings Beckett had brought to life against his will. Feelings he didn't want because they confused him and distracted him from his tasks and his goals.
Upon hearing the news that Ha'gel had killed her, he had felt relief mingled with pain and sorrow about the things that could have been.
When he got the message that Beckett was still alive he had left everything behind him and had run to his office where she had been waiting for him. Pain and confusion had flickered in her eyes. Her vulnerability had woken the urge to protect her against whom or whatever in him. He had knelt next to her chair and had looked up at her, and his feelings had been clearly visible in his eyes. But she had been too confused to recognise it.
He had fought those feelings, just as he was doing right now.
He didn't want to think about the way he had sat at her bed in the hospital after fighting the Atavus, about how close he had felt to her in that moment, about the soft whisper that had wormed its way into his mind through the deep inky blackness of the night and had been echoing incessantly inside of him since then.
“You and me - we belong together.”
Beckett had become a danger to the Taelons.
He wanted this to occupy his mind - and only this.
Sandoval banished every other thought from his mind.
“If Lieutenant Beckett's CVI fails, she has to be eliminated”, he replied calmly.

 

Act # 3
 

Everything had changed. Those many voices had merged into one, its soft sound touching her soul like velvet. With the instinct that was embedded in every living being, Lieutenant Siobhan Beckett knew that she was dying.
But she felt no fear.
How could she have feared the death that revealed himself to her as a liberator?
The CVI-triggered clarity had given way to a different kind of clarity, which allowed Beckett to see her life in a completely different light.
Everything was transitory.
Everything that ever came to life had to die one day.
With every beat of her heart, her life slipped away a little bit further.
But her memory would live on in Liam.
In her son Liam.
He was the legacy she left behind. He would wipe out the culpability she had put upon herself during her duty for the Taelons.
With this certainty she could peacefully die in Liam's arms.
In the arms of her son whom she loved.
Even though it wasn't his name that laid on her lips when she died ...

 

Act # 4
 

Liam Kincaid thought he would die from the pain. He held Beckett's body in his arms, so warm, yet lifeless. She had been his mother and he had loved her, despite what she had done while doing her duty for the Taelons.
“If your mother was here right now, what would you tell her?”
“I would tell her: I love you.”
If it had been possible to bring her back to life by giving his life for hers, he would have done so without so much as blinking.
Her head was resting on his chest and he softly stroked her red hair while rocking her like a child. It didn't matter that she didn't feel any of this, he just couldn't help himself.
For far too long he had had to hide the truth and suppress his feelings.
“Do we know each other, Major Kincaid?”
“Not from this life.”
In this life they couldn't have been mother and son for each other. Only death had given him the opportunity to reveal himself to her.
But at what cost?
A soft, barely audible sound caused Liam to look up.
On a ledge above him Agent Sandoval stood and watched him silently.
How much of the conversation between mother and son had he overheard?
Liam searched Sandoval's expressionless features without finding an answer.
Yet in the depth of those eyes that scrutinised him steadfastly, he thought he saw the ghost of an emotion he couldn't interpret. But as fast as this expression had flickered to life it disappeared, and Liam wasn't sure anymore that it had ever been there.
Probably not.
The dim light of the cave must have played tricks on his eyes.

 

Epilogue
 

The rune of destiny ...
How cool and smooth it felt, yet it seemed to be burning in his hand, set on fire by his heart which spoke different words than his mind did.
Sandoval closed his eyes and with the help of his CVI he submerged into the memories of the evening when he had first seen the rune ...
Beckett had searched for his gaze and had held it.
She had smiled while the flickering light of the candles cast shadows on the wall and her face, where he found the confirmation that she could see right through him.
He hadn't been able to fool her any more than he could have fooled himself.
Fate had brought them together.
He had said goodbye and had left. But both of them had known that it was an escape.
Sandoval opened his eyes and gazed at the rune in the palm of his hand.
The two candles he had lit flickered slightly in the warm evening breeze that had found its way through the open window of his office.
Two candles ...
Symbols of two lives joined together inseparably forever.
He had tried to fight fate.
Now he had lost the fight.
Beckett's death had sealed his fate. Because now there was no more reason for him to be afraid of his feelings any longer.
Sandoval put away the rune.
Then he bent forward and blew out the candles.

 

FINIS

 

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